I had a great deal of trouble getting started on this post – not because I didn’t know what I wanted to talk about, but because I wanted to talk about two things, one very joyous, and one very sad. I wasn’t sure how to connect them. Having written both things, and come back round to re-write the introduction, I realize that is, of course, the connection – that is life – the joy and the sorrow all together.

The joy is the holidays. On Christmas Eve we went to my brother’s house for the traditional prime rib, (and the real star of the show, my sister-in-law’s Yorkshire pudding YUM 😋). I contributed cookies, of course, and holiday pound cake – my mom’s recipe that I hadn’t made in years. Christmas morning, we slept in, then opened our few gifts – we very intentionally did minimal gifts, for obvious reasons 🙃. Everyone was very pleased with the gifts they did get! I think this is a better way to do Christmas – one or two gifts the receiver actually wants, and lots of delicious food 💗😋

We apparently did a terrible job taking pictures on Christmas day! Not pictured – Iris also got a new (to her) computer, a dragon squishmellow from Jade, and a bamboo hairbrush from my sister. She also got things for Jade and I, but they haven’t arrived yet. I also got James fancy coffee and beer, both locally crafted, and Jade got me a fancy Dubai chocolate bar.

Our friend came over, and he helped me clear the dining room enough that we could use the table and hang my light fixture. This fixture was my mom’s, so it hung in the dining room here when I came to consciousness (we lived here when I was ~age 2 -7). When we moved to Glens Falls, mom shipped my sister and I off to our grandparents for the summer, so when we came back, the new house was already completely set-up. I noticed the light fixture almost immediately – and asked my mom about it. I’d always assumed it was my aunt’s.

My mom told me that no, it was hers… and also probably told me where she got it and how long she’d had it, but I was seven, so 🤷🏻‍♀️. I do remember that she paid good money for it, and that she was very proud of it. I also want to say she told me then that it would be mine someday, but that might just be my memory playing tricks on me 🤔. When we moved back to this house when I was in high school, my aunt was very happy to have the fixture back in the dining room. By then, my mother was adamant that the fixture was mine, and that it would only stay in the house until I had a place to put it.

If you’ve been following along from the beginning, you’ll know that James and I moved a lot for many years, so the fixture stayed here, from ~1995 to sometime, in 2021, or ’22, maybe? We bought our house in the spring of 2019, but it needed a bunch of work before it was ready, and then the pandemic, and then my aunt pushed me off a couple of times, saying she didn’t have anything to replace it with. Finally I just went to our local home improvement thrift shop, bought a replacement and took mine home. My aunt wasn’t especially happy, but hey – fair’s fair, she’d had the thing for nearly 30 years 🤷🏻‍♀️.

Now here we are again, and here it is again – back in the dining room. It does look absolutely beautiful in the room. I have always loved the yellow and blue birds and blooms wallpaper (with matching curtains!) in the dining room, and the yellow stained-glass light could be custom matched. You can understand why I just assumed the fixture belonged in the room when I was a kid.

In addition to changing the light, we set the table with a festive tablecloth, nice dishes, and lit candles. It was very pretty, and I hope it made my aunt happy. It was my present to her – the light back up, the fancy China and Fostoria, and a nice meal she didn’t have to cook!

My aunt, in turn, gave us very thoughtful gifts from her collections – James got a history/cookbook (perfect, if you know him!), and Jade, Iris, and I each got jewelry that fits our individual styles❤️. All in all, I felt like it was a wonderful holiday with family and friends. Someday it might be fun to host a huge, raucous, multi-day affair like my aunt and mom hosted (I guess I should include my uncle as a host – he paid for it, but let’s be real, we know who did the work!) when I was a kid, but our low-key, cozy day was perfect for this year 🎄💗.

On a much sadder note, we lost the little min pin, Princess. When I first started coming here this summer, I believed Princess was on death’s door. She was 17, blind and mostly deaf; had a few tumors, at least one sizeable; and was often snotty and congested. She almost never left the bathroom, except to potty on the floor in the kitchen. She would startle if you touched her, and she rarely made any noise other than snuffles and wheezing.

The vet said Princess probably only had a few months to live, but as long as she wasn’t in pain, she was basically fine for the time being. So, we resolved to just give her the best last few months we could. She started coming out of her shell (and the bathroom) a little while we were going back and forth this summer. By the time we’d been living here a couple of weeks, she was a completely different dog.

We took her outside, fed her wet dog food and people food, held her and pet her loved her. She started acting, well, like a dog. She would come out to greet us when we came in the kitchen. She’d bark and scratch at the screen door if we went outside without her; she’d bark at strangers in the house, or at loud noises. You could tell she loved to be outside. She’d meander drunkenly around the yard just waggin’ her little tail like mad (she was not actually drunk, but that’s what a blind, nearly deaf, seventeen-year-old dog on spindly little legs looks like in a yard full of ruts, pits, and walnuts). Then we’d go to the porch, where she’d find a sunny spot to bask – sometimes displacing the big dog from the cushion 😄. When it was too chilly for her to wander or bask, she’d bark and/or scratch at your leg until you picked her up and put her in your sweatshirt. I’d forgotten how much I liked having a dog that I could carry around in my shirt – the first dog James and I had together was a five-pound miniature dachshund that wanted nothing more in life than to be on my lap 😄❤️🐶.

We really liked having Princess around, even if she did just pee and 💩 kinda wherever 😆. She was funny to watch and nice to snuggle with. She brought joy to our lives, and I hope that we made her finals months the best that they could be.

Many traditions recognize the mix of delight and grief that is life, and many artists and poets have described it far more eloquently than I’m capable of right now. In my faith tradition, we have “joys and sorrows” or “joys and concerns” each week. Every congregation does it a little bit differently, but every week, congregants have the opportunity to share what is on their heart – whether expressed symbolically or shared aloud with the congregation. It has always been one of the most meaningful parts of service for me. I value getting to know the congregation, and sharing a part of myself, in that way. I have experienced the relief of sorrow shared; and the multiplication of joy shared 💗. Thank you for sharing this joy and grief with me.